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Plan A MOM in a Plan B World Blog Interview with Vonda Skelton
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Good Behavior? Bad Behavior?
“Change requires we set our minds on God’s ways, rather than give in to our fleshly tendencies.” |
Judy looked forward to a quiet night. Enroute to a family reunion, she dreaded the upcoming barrage of questions she faced. “What happened to you and Jake?” “I wish you would work it out, dear.” Dare she blurt out, “He’s a creep and routinely bereats me?”
After checking into her motel room, she headed for the front desk. “Where’s the closest place I can get dinner?” she asked. After receiving directions, she checked her watch. It was early, but she decided to go ahead and pick up dinner so she could get back to her room before dark.
“This is going to be a horrible night!” the woman taking her order bemoaned.” Judy suddenly forgot about the reunion and felt for the woman, wondering what problems she had when the customer in line behind her, asked, “What did you order?” Turning, Judy faced a nice-looking, well dressed man. He repeated the question, “What did you get?”
Judy wanted to blurt out, “What do you care?” but instead politely answered, “a salad”. Sam seemed to forget he was supposed to be placing an order. “You don’t really want to take your salad to go. Can I buy you a beer?”
Suddenly Judy was uncomfortable. “No, thank you.” She started to explain she didn’t like beer, was married, and for him to buzz off, but decided the short answer might help him better get the hint.
Sam continued with unabashedly flirtatious remarks while Judy noted his wedding ring and gold igtheus bracelet. Certainly he would have seen her ring which she wore even though she and Jake were separated.
The above scenarios play out thousands of times and begs two questions to be answered. First, why do we behave badly; if not in the above ways, in our own way? The second is, can we do anything about it?
The first question is easy to answer. We behave badly because we have a sin nature. It’s described in the Bible as “carnal” and is the opposite of righteous. It’s the child in us that wants what we see, wants it now, and doesn’t care about the effect it has on others or the harm it brings.
The second question is harder to answer, but God does have an answer. Yes, we can do something about our bad behavior. Consider the following and which is an important step for you to take at this time in your life.
*Change begins in the heart.
Deuteronomy 10:16 commands us: “circumcise your heart, and stiffen your neck no more.” At physical birth, circumcision is a procedure to remove the foreskin. In spiritual terms, it is symbolic of removing the “fleshly” nature; that which is set against God. It’s “removed” so a person can live by God’s Spirit. Spiritual circumcision takes place at our spiritual birth when we confess, “Jesus is Lord,” and we repent of our sins to follow Christ. It’s done by Spirit of God. Romans 2:29, Col 2:11.
*Change requires we set our mind on God’s ways, rather than give in to our fleshly tendencies.
Having been “circumcised of the flesh,” we’re to live according to God’s nature and ways. This is where unbelievers fall. We fail to take to heart God’s command that we no longer live according to our flesh, but rather according to the Spirit. Consider Paul’s warning: “Those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit. For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace,” Romans 8:5-6.
Colossians 3:2 continues, “Set your mind on the things above, not on the things of earth.” 1 Peter 2:11-12a echoes, “abstain from fleshly lusts which wage war against the soul. Keep your behavior excellent…”
Bad behavior? Good behavior? Do you have a ring, a cross, or an igtheus hanging around your neck or on your finger? Do you claim to be a Christian? If so, check your heart. Have you truly repented of your sin to follow Christ and His ways? If you have, check your mind. Are you setting your mind on God’s ways of thinking and living?
Yes, we can do something about our behavior. It starts with our heart and continues in our minds.
Father, thank You for the insight You give us about our behavior. Thank You for circumcising our hearts so that we can live by Your Spirit. Train us to set our minds on you and live by Your Spirit.
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect,” Romans 12:2
Jesus Set His Eyes On The Gold: God.
When You Can’t Find a Silver Lining, Look for the Gold
Copyright Debbie Taylor Williams
February 15 I attended a memorial service for my pastor, John Petty, who died of a gunshot wound to the head. No foul play was involved. As family and friends have grieved, a question begs to be answered: What if you can’t find the proverbial silver lining when going through a dark Plan B time?
I don’t have the answer to many questions, I know the one who does: Jesus. What did He do when no silver lining appeared visible, when He was tired, lonely, and grieved? He looked up. Go with me to the following places where a silver lining just wouldn’t do, so Jesus set His eyes on the gold: God.
In John 11:35 we find Jesus weeping over Lazarus’s death. Jesus had already been charged with the accusation that if He had been there, Lazarus wouldn’t have died. What did Jesus do in the face of death? He directed friends and family to look up to the glory of God. “Jesus raised up His eyes and said, ‘Father, I thank You that You have heard Me.’” (Jn 11:41) In this tragic incidence, Jesus said we have a Father in heaven. He hears and is all powerful.
In Matthew 14:19 Jesus wasn’t confronted with a friend’s death, but rather a sea of 5,000 hungry people. The place was desolate. The hour late. “Send the crowds away,” the disciples suggested. However, Jesus had a different plan in the midst of this bleak situation. Taking five loaves of bread and two fish in His hands He “looked up” and blessed the food. There may not have been a silver lining in the clouds that day, but God reigned and more than met their needs.
“What if you can’t find the proverbial silver lining when going through a dark Plan B time? Jesus knows the answer. He looked up and he set his eyes on the gold: God.” |
What did Jesus do when He wasn’t ministering to others, but rather, was faced with His own despair? Matthew 26:38-41 tells us Jesus called friends to be with Him. As the doom of the cross lay before Him, Jesus asked His friends to keep watch with Him. He stated “the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak” so keep watching and praying. (v 42) Jesus fell on His face and “looked up.” He focused on the gold and praised God as His Father.
Jesus isn’t the only one who models setting our eyes on the gold when there isn’t a silver lining. In 2 Chronicles 20:3 when Jehoshaphat was afraid and faced with an overwhelming enemy, he “turned his attention to seek the Lord…” … “O LORD, the God of our fathers, are You not the God in the heavens? …Power and might are in Your hand so that no one can stand against You. We are powerless…nor do we know what to do, but our eyes are on You.” (6,12) “Then…the Spirit of the Lord came.” (14)
What can we learn? Knowing our spirit is willing, but our flesh is weak, we can follow Jesus’ and Jehoshaphat’s example. We can ask friends to stay and pray with us. We can set our eyes on God and look to Him. We can praise, “Our Father, power and might are in Your hands. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on You.” Would you pray that with me now?
In Christ’s Joy,
Debbie
Debbie Taylor Williams
www.debbietaylorwilliams.com
Plan A Woman In A Plan B World, What To Do When Life Doesn’t Go According to Plan, copyright Debbie Taylor Williams
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Silver Linings in Busted Pipes
“Debbie!” Keith called in a not so quiet voice. Rushing to the entry of our bedroom, we stared at the water pouring from our ceiling onto our bed and floor. Jumping into action, Keith ran to turn off the water while I began gathering every bowl and serving dish that could hold water. For the next hours, I rotated emptying bowls of water while Keith tried to locate the source of the leak, call the plumber, carpet cleaner, and our insurance agency. Towels we put on the floor to absorb the deluge were to no avail. As the ceiling began cracking, I hurriedly gathered pictures, books, and candles off tables in case it caved in. Having never experienced pipes bursting, I had no idea what to expect. All I knew was that it didn’t look good. Scooping water off the comforter on our bed and gathering bed pillows continued between emptying bowls of water. What I didn’t know, but would later find out was the leak had started long before we knew it. Water had been accumulating in the insulation in the attic. Therefore, even after the water was turned off, the deluge continued.
“What silver lining are you discovering in Plan B?” |
Phase two of me being surprised was when the plumbers arrived and one of them announced, “This ceiling will have to come down and we’ll have to tear the carpet out. “What?” I wanted to say. I think, “You’re kidding!” did slip out. However, I soon understood why the ceiling had to come down. Sagging, sopping insulation weighted the ceiling. It had to be removed. In addition to the pipes being fixed, blowers had to be set up in the attic, bedroom, and family room where the water had migrated. Keith’s and my Friday night Plan A, to go to a movie and have a quiet evening at home was replaced with a Plan B live viewing of six men tearing down our ceiling and carrying the heavy drenched insulation and carpet out in large plastic bags.
As I snapped pictures for the claims adjuster, my mind started filling with spiritual applications surrounding the bursted pipes. First, things pent up inside are eventually going to burst. When that happens, words are going to leak or perhaps pour out of our mouths. Criticism or bitterness may drip into conversations. Wouldn’t it be better to check our hearts before the Lord each day and allow Him to repair any tiny holes before they become serious issues that cause major damage?
Second, Plan Bs can have silver linings even if they require us to do things we hadn’t planned. As Keith and I walked amid boxes he’d removed from the attic to make room for the plumbers, we realized we needed to go through them to check for water damage. We found a lot that needed throwing away and some that needed giving away. God doesn’t want to waste moments in our lives. Why not look to Him and search for the silver lining in your plan B?
Third, sometimes we need others’ help. Keith and I couldn’t do what the plumbers and carpet cleaning company did, we wouldn’t have thought about looking to checkout this page to find out what to do. They had the know how and equipment to handle our situation. The Christian community is filled with people who are familiar with different issues we may be experiencing. Pastors, Christian counselors, support groups, and Bible studies and courses are available to address every need.
Bursted pipes, political unrest, family issues, financial concerns, job instability, harsh weather, and health problems aren’t fun. They present challenges. However, with God in our midst, we can find a silver lining. What silver lining are you discovering in your Plan B?
Father, please help me to see the silver lining in the Plan B’s in my life. Help me to turn to you to see the positive in every situation and not hold bitterness or criticism in my heart. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Plan A Woman In A Plan B World, What To Do When Life Doesn’t Go According to Plan, copyright Debbie Taylor Williams
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Learn From Jesus in the Midst Of Your Plan B
“Are you being obedient to His command to learn from Him?” |
Standing in the room, I chatted with the other two ladies and breathed a sigh of relief that there weren’t more people in the class. The music began and so did the instructor. No, I was not in a ballroom dancing class, although that would have been a Plan A place for me to be. Instead, I had decided to do something different, learn something new and fun: Zumba! In case you’re not familiar with Zumba, it’s a Latin-inspired dance-fitness program. I’d seen the advertisements on television and decided it would be a great way to workout. However, I am not a dancer so Zumba has been a stretch for me. I’ve been attending for several months and am trying to learn the steps. In the meantime, while I’m sure I look more silly than sane, I am getting a good aerobic workout.
What about you? Are you learning new things? Or are you set in your ways? Why is it important to learn new things? Physically and mentally, stimulating activities strengthen our brain cells and bodies. Spiritually, Jesus tells us in Matthew 11:29, “…learn from Me.”
When Jesus says, “learn from Me,” He is not making a casual suggestion. Rather, in Matthew 11:29, “learn” is in the aorist imperative tense. The Discovery Bible explains that it is a command to “do this!” (Don’t just try!) BEGIN to do this now! In other words, Jesus calls us to a specific and definite decision to learn from Him!
Why would Jesus give this command? He is interested in you. He loves you. He sees what you are going through. He has compassion. And, He has a better way for you to handle your Plan Bs than you might imagine.
What can we learn from Jesus?
We learn from Jesus that we can find rest for our souls. Spiritual rest is not dependent on the circumstances of our lives being perfect. Rather, soul rest is the result of walking in step with Jesus.
We learn from Jesus that a way to stand against temptations (that often land us in Plan Bs) is by having Scripture memorized and applying it in the face of temptation. When Satan came to Jesus in the wilderness and tempted Him, Jesus didn’t fall for Satan’s lies because He knew the truth (Scripture) and stood on it.
We learn from Jesus how to forgive….from the heart. We learn that no matter what someone has done to us, it doesn’t compare to how we’ve sinned against God. Matthew 18:33
We learn from Jesus to pray in the midst of whatever we’re going through or whatever decisions we’re making. “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you,” Matthew 7:7. We find Jesus praying all night before He selected His disciples. We see Jesus praying before He divided the fish and loaves. We hear Jesus praying outside of Lazarus’ tomb.
We learn from Jesus not to worry. Although that can be a hard one in the midst of Plan Bs, Jesus clearly states, “So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble on its own,” Matthew 7:34.
There is so much we can learn from Jesus. Are you being obedient to His command to learn from Him? Learning Zumba is a fun optional way to get a workout. Learning from Jesus is not an option if you want to experience rest for your soul. Why not begin learning spiritual steps from Jesus today? You may even discover it is fun.
Excerpts from The Plan A Woman in a Plan B World: What to Do When Life Doesn’t Go According to Plan, copyright Debbie Taylor Williams
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Floundering or Flowing?
The fish lay on the grass beside the pond. First it flipped one way, then another. No matter how hard it tried, it couldn’t get back in the water. Floundering, it longed to effortlessly swim the lake once again.
Many of us feel the same when Plan B hits. We don’t like our situation. We want things to be as they were once were; when we felt comfortable and able to move and do as we please.
If you feel like you’re floundering today, the Apostle Paul tells us how to move beyond our floundering condition to a place where the Holy Spirit is flowing in our hearts.
In Romans 5:1-5, Paul explains that we can place our hope in God and when we do,
“Are you floundering? Or is the love of Christ flowing within you?” |
“…hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts
through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” In other words, we may not always see the big picture while we’re going through Plan Bs. But as we pray and trust God, we will experience His divine presence and peace “poured out within our hearts.”
In the midst of your Plan B, will you place your hope in Christ? Will you open your heart to the love of God being poured out within you through the Holy Spirit? Will you experience the flow God offers rather than flounder in your Plan B?
Father, thank You that I don’t have to flounder in my Plan B. I can fix my hope on You. I can experience the flow of the Holy Spirit being poured out within my heart. I ask You to fill me now with Your Spirit and flow in me. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Move beyond floundering in Plan B to the love of God flowing within your heart.
Excerpts from The Plan A Woman in a Plan B World: What to Do When Life Doesn’t Go According to Plan, copyright Debbie Taylor Williams
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God Cares about this Season of Your Life
“Now Noah was six hundred years old when the flood of water came upon the earth,” Genesis 7:6.
“In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, on the seventeenth day of the month, on the same day all the fountains of the great deep burst open, and the floodgates of the sky were opened,” Genesis 7:11.
“Now it came about in the six hundred and first year, in the first month, on the first of the month, the water was dried up from the earth. Then Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and behold, the surface of the ground was dried up,” Genesis 8:13.
Sometimes we forget that our lives are important to God. We don’t consider that God takes note of our years, months, and days. This may be especially true
“God cares about this season of your life and your Plan B moments.” |
when we’re going through a “Plan B” time. However, the Bible contains a record of people’s Plan B years, months, and days. We don’t have to wonder what day of the month it was when the flood came. It was the seventeenth. Nor do we need to be puzzled about the day of month Noah removed the covering of the ark and the ground was dry. It was the first day of the first month when Noah was 601.
God knew what was happening on the first day of the first month of Noah’s 601st birthday. God also takes note of us.
What is God noticing about your first month of 2011?
In case you’ve been taught that God doesn’t concern Himself with those who aren’t “big” names like Moses, Noah, Abraham, and Esther, I beg to differ. What causes these people to stand out as “big” has more to do with their responsiveness to God in their Plan B moments than how big their bank accounts were or what their social standing was.
Noah walked to the beat of a different drummer than those swept away by what they would have considered a Plan B flood. God’s Plan A for Abraham took him to a new country. Esther’s parents died when she was a young girl. However, God had a Plan A for her. She was raised by her cousin and later saved the Jews. Moses paid attention when God spoke to him through a bush and was therefore able to lead others in God’s Plan A ways.
God hasn’t changed. He still takes notice of people who call to Him in the midst of their Plan B’s. As you enter a new season of your life this first month of the year 2011, will you commit to be a person who listens and responds to God in the midst of Plan B’s? How? Meet with Him daily with your Bible open and pen and paper handy to write down what He impresses on your heart. Do what He impresses you to do. Grow and mature spiritually as He leads you. Respond to areas of service and relationships into which He draws you.
Won’t it be exciting on the last day of the last month of the year 2011 to look back and see how God has infused your life with His Plan A blessings?
“‘I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.'” Jer 29:11-13
Father, Thank You that You care about me in this season of my life. Thank You that You can infuse my life with Your blessings even in the midst of my Plan B moments. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
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Celebrate Christ
Excerpt from “Preparing Our Hearts for Christmas,” copyright Debbie Taylor Williams, page 6-7
For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:11
In the Taylor household in which I grew up, birthdays were a cause for celebration. Weeks before a birthday, we began talking about the birthday person’s special day. We made plans to honor the person with a party. We baked a cake and bought special birthday napkins. We thoughtfully purchased presents with the birthday person in mind.
As I contemplate the attention given to people on their birthdays, I cannot help but wonder if at Christmas I am guilty of giving more attention to what others want than to what Jesus wants. Does He want me to be more kind to others? Does He want me to give graciously to the needy? Does He want me to put away a certain sin that distances me from Him? Does He long for me to spend more time with Him in prayer? I wonder what Christmas would be like if I celebrated Christ and honored want He wants this season.
Celebrate Christ in the morning and eve.
Celebrate Christ for the Gift you’ve received.
Think on the treasure He gives from above
Salvation so free, the power of His love.
Worship Christ. Hold Him close in your heart.
Worship the Lord who will never depart.
Sing praises to Him and often say prayers.
Speak to Him daily of your love and your cares.
Celebrate Christ not just this season.
Celebrate Christ when there seems no reason.
Celebrate Christ – His birth, Him now risen.
Celebrate Christ this Christmas season.
Lord, help me keep my eyes on Jesus and celebrate Him today and every day. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

What’s On Your Heart this Christmas?
Excerpt from “Preparing Our Hearts for Christmas,” copyright Debbie Taylor Williams.
I will never forget when I was a child and my Sunday School teacher challenged my class to memorize the Christmas story found in Luke 2:1-14. What seemed a daunting task became manageable as mother helped me memorize one small section at a time. Every year since then, I read the Christmas story and cherish its words hidden in my heart. One year, when Taylor and Lauren asked what they could give me for Christmas, I told them the best gift would be for them to memorize Luke 2:1-14.
What’s on your heart this Christmas? |
You can imagine the looks on their faces. However, Christmas morning my wish came true. Although they didn’t know it at the time, my request was truly a gift to them. There are few treasures greater than God’s Word hidden in our hearts.
Although “The Night Before Christmas” may be more often read in homes across America, it can never compare with the true meaning of Christmas: the celebration of Christ’s birth; God’s demonstration of His love by giving us His only begotten Son. This year, why not begin some new traditions? Help your children or grandchildren memorize the Christmas story and recite it each year. Or, as Keith does in our home, read the Christmas story before you begin opening presents. Let the true meaning of Christmas dwell in your heart.
Luke 2:1-14
“And it came to pass, in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed. And this taxing was first done when Quirinius was governor of Syria. And all went to be taxed, everyone into his own city. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem (because he was of the house and lineage of David), to be taxed with Mary, his espoused wife, being great with child. 6 And so it was that while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. And she brought forth her first-born son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, an angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them; and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, ‘Fear not; for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you: Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly praising God, and saying, ‘Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.’”
Ba-ooon! Thanksgiving to the Father
“Ba-ooon! Ba-ooon!” With a worried look, two year old Logan turned his face toward me then pointed to the ceiling. “Ba-ooon!” he repeated, pointing to his blue birthday balloon that had drifted to the vaulted ceiling.
“I know, Logan. I’m sorry, but Mimi can’t reach it.”
“For what does your heart long?Why not tell your Father right now?” |
“Logan, Mommy can’t reach it. I’m sorry.”
Ba-ooon! Ba-ooon!” Logan repeated as he stood in the circle of family that had gathered for his birthday. You could almost read his mind, “Can’t anyone get that balloon off the ceiling?”
Turning toward his granddaddies, he again made his request known; not accepting that it was impossible to reach the top of the high ceiling. “Ba-ooon! Ba-ooon!” he pointed out to them.
Grandmother Edie who was walking upstairs, showed Logan that although she tried, her arms couldn’t reach the balloon. Unsatisfied, Logan repeated “ba-ooon!” continuing to point to the blue balloon adrift beyond anyone’s reach. Numerous attempts to distract little one were to no avail. Watching him, I observed one who would one day stand determinedly for what he wanted. However, on this occasion, his stamina and conviction seemed to no avail.
Then, quietly, without a word, I noticed Logan’s daddy rise and go into the utility room. As typical with Chris, there was no fanfare. I watched him return with an extension rod and knew immediately that Logan was going to get his wish. Logan didn’t yet know what his father was doing.
“Ba-ooon” Logan once again repeated. “Yes, Logan,” we explained. “Your balloon is on the ceiling and none of us could get it, but your daddy can. Watch!”
With all eyes glued on Chris, he climbed the stairs, then extended the narrow silver rod more and more until it reached the baooon. “Yeah!” Cheers went up. “Daddy got the balloon!” As quietly as he had climbed the stairs, Chris descended and handed the blue balloon to his son. The once fretful face that had looked to all of us to no avail now grinned ear to ear as he looked at his father.
On Thanksgiving Day, we traditionally remember the Pilgrims celebration of the first harvest. However, let us not be remiss in also turning a smiling face to our Heavenly Father. We, like Logan, may have fretfully looked about to others during the past year, then found it was God alone who accomplished our requests.
In addition, on Thanksgiving Day, as with other days, things aren’t always going to go according to plan. The oven may go out and the turkey not get cooked, family we had hoped to see may not come home, differences of opinion may arise, a loved one may be hospitalized. However, like Logan, we have a FATHER who knows our disappointments and sees our worried faces. Rather than simply look to others and voice our complaints, why not turn our faces heavenward? Let us not forget that Jesus told us “…do not be worried…” Mt 6:25, “Do not worry…” Mt 6:31, “So do not worry…” Mt 6:35. Instead of fretting, let us do as Christ taught and Logan modeled. Let us ask and keep asking, seek and keep seeking, knock and keep knocking, remembering Jesus said, “Everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened,” Mt 7:7-8.
Logan longed for his balloon and let his father know about it. For what does your heart long? Why not tell your Father right now? Then, use this Thanksgiving Day to look heavenward, smile, and thank Him for His answers.
“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with THANKSGIVING, let your requests be made known to God,” Philippians 4:6.
Heavenly Father, thank You that You are always present to hear my prayers. Thank You that nothing is too difficult for You. I love You and praise You for Your love, guidance, protection, and th my loved ones today and remind them to turn their faces heavenward and to find their hope, strength, joy, and thankfulness in You. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
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